Things have changed. Materials have changed. Nothing seems like the stereotypes of relationships that used to be in the 80s and early 90s. Back then the only thing you had to do was to buy her flowers and tell her how beautiful she is in order to get your chance in a relationship. OK, most of the times you got rejected but I can’t say that it was a sure “No” back then. It was almost something like “try harder you can do better than that”. Another reason for the rejection was the way you expressed it. If you were anxious or afraid, women could understand it. They smelled it. The meaning was a really complicated message that was coming out through movies.
Do you really remember 80s and early 90s movies? Do you remember the characters who at the end they were in a relationship with “the girl of their dreams” although they were clumsy, almost irritatingly afraid of the possibility of a rejection. Do you really want me to give you examples? The teenager Patrick Dempsey in the movie “Can’t buy me love” in 1987, he pays the most popular girl in his school in order to pretend that they are couple and in that way to win the popularity and the acceptance of the non-geek side of the school. As clumsy as hell and at the end of the movie he earns the girl.
Another example is the movie “Say anything”. You know.. That movie which has this great scene with this guy who has a boom box over his shoulders trying to win back his girl by playing their favorite song. In this movie John Cusack (my favorite actor by far) is a teenager who is in love for a long time with the best student of the school, a girl who is devoted to her lessons and he never had the courage to approach her and so he does in their graduation day.
So, the message was that no matter how scared or slouch you were, you could always win the girl because at the end women love that style of men. And that was so wrong. Most of the times the only thing you had to do in order to win the girl was to be patient and persistent. Every girl needs to feel that someone loves everything that has to do with her.
Things nowadays seems to be different and a lot stranger. There has been a research a few months ago from the Revolutionary Behaviors Research Centre which shows a lot of different results compared with the likes and dislikes of 80s and 90s. They chose 110 women and gave them a lot of cards with different types of men and the main question was ”with who would you have sex and with who would you consider a steady relationship?”. For the sexual part of the question, women (as expected) they chose the most fit guys with big muscles or the guys who whore suits. So far, so good. For the steady relationship part of the question most of those women indicated these photos of guys who were wearing wedding rings. Really? Seriously, what is wrong with you? Your perfect ideal of a man who can be the best solution for a steady relationship is that guy that will leave his wife to be with you?
The only reason for your decision that I could think is that if a man is married, it means that he is ready for a commitment like that and in your brain that’s kind of hot. But if you had some time to think your decision, you would realize that this is unacceptable. If a man was ready for a commitment like that, you wouldn’t have seen such a large percentage in divorce cases.
The same experiment was taken by 110 men and the results were a lot easier than women. Because most of men have indicated the most good-looking women for both parts of the question.A man when it comes to sex they don’t care if a woman is a model or a professor as long as she wants to have sex. When it comes to relationships (and I have the strong feeling that I’m talking on behalf of the majority of men nowadays) men are always looking for the women who talk less, complain less, always take care of how they look and know how to maintain the sexual spark and being a perfect person that you can discuss almost everything. And I say almost because you can’t discuss with your woman, topics like how hot are other women.
The fun part of this research is that a large percentage of that women are the ones that make the first move. They don’t expect for men to make a move because they’ll probably wait for years before they make the first move. Because if in the times of 80s and 90s men used to fear the rejection, men, nowadays don’t want to be rejected so they don’t make the first move. Don’t be afraid to make the first move if it’s worth it.
Live, love, travel and dare. You only live once and you should make your own decisions without complaints and indications on how you should live and spend.